Monday, 18 September 2017

Self Care For When You Hit Rock Bottom

About two weeks ago, I posted a picture on one of my instagram accounts about self care for when you hit rock bottom. I wrote in the caption that I would make a blog post with several more tips...I forgot to do that. Luckily, somebody commented on that post with another self care tip and that reminded me to make this post!

The tips on the original post are:

  • Can't shower or take a bath? Dry shampoo can make your hair look and feel cleaner and baby wipes or makeup wipes work great to get the top layer of grime off your skin.
  • Can't wash your sheets and make your bed? Push your blankets out of the way and shake the crumbs off of your sheet. It will at least be a bit more comfortable.
The tip given to me by a follower on Instagram is:
  • You can also use a flannel and some hot water and soap if you can't use baby wipes for whatever reason.
Here are my tips for you:
  • Having trouble with brushing your teeth? Take a piece of tissue or cloth and gently wipe off any residue off of your teeth. You can also put a bit of toothpaste and a bit of water in your mouth, then swish them around. This will neutralise any acidic stuff on your teeth.
  • Struggling to brush your hair regularly? Run your fingers through your hair regularly and try to give your hair 1-minute combs to get rid of the surface knots when they begin to appear.
  • Is cooking a proper meal just too much for you right now? This tip takes a bit more effort but it's less effort than cooking a full meal. Add a can of chopped tomatoes or passata to a pan. Add some frozen vegetables if you have them. Add a can of beans if you have any! Beans are great in soups! Maybe add a few herbs. Then you just let it sit on a low-ish heat and stir occasionally. It should be ready in 15 to 20 minutes.
  • Another food that's easy to cook is scrambled egg. Crack an egg into a saucepan or frying pan (before turning on the heat) and mix it around with the fork. You can add a little splash of milk if you want. Also, if you ever see 'season all' spice mix in the supermarket, I highly recommend this! Add a little bit to your scrambled egg or your soup and the flavour will be even better!
  • Had trouble sleeping last night? Try half a cup of green tea, or a full cup if you're used to caffeine. This will give you a little extra energy to get through the first part of the day. Although, the caffeine means that it's definitely not the best idea for everyone.
  • Never have anything for breakfast? Try saving a bit of last night's dinner for the morning and reheating it.
I really hope these tips help someone! If you think of any others, please comment down below! You can also email me tips and I can add them to this post! My email address is on the 'Contact Me' page. Thank you for reading and goodbye until next time! 
~Jay

My Gender Experiences Pt.2

This time I'm going to talk about my gender identity in the past and how I discovered my gender identity.

I'm an AFAB (that means I was assigned female at birth). Growing up, I never questioned whether my gender was different from what I was assigned. However, as long as I can remember I've known there was something 'different'. I always just put it down to me being weird. I was always a little isolated from other people. I had friends and I wasn't lonely, but a lot of my childhood memories are of me on my own. I think this is why I don't recall having any strong gender stereotypes imposed on me whilst growing up.

This has just reminded me of the time that my mum bought me some new pajamas. My mum realised once giving them to me that she'd accidentally picked them up from the "boy's" section. She didn't take them back or give them away. She just said something along the lines of, "Oh well!"

This isn't the only example of not following strict gender roles that I have. I've always had a mixture of male and female friends, and growing up I wasn't restricted in what toys I could play with. I used to have a lot of toy cars. One of my favourites was an old model of Ferrari which had openable front doors and headlights that could be flipped up. I was more interested in nature documentaries and science books than I was toys growing up, both of which aren't really the sort of thing people would associate with being for one gender or the other.

During my early teenage years (12-14) I still had that feeling of being 'weird' but I now felt 'different', too. I was the sort of person who would share "I'm not like other girls!" posts on Google+. Spoiler alert: That's because I'm not a girl! Another type of post I used to share was those "Option A or Option B" things. One of them said "Tomboy or Girly Girl." My answer to that one was that I definitely wasn't a girly girl but I wasn't really a tomboy.

When I was 14, I met a new friend. After several months of getting to know this new friend, they came out to me as genderfluid at the same time as a few other people from my school. They explained to me what genderfluid meant. I didn't relate to this term myself but this was basically the start of me figuring out that I was part of the LGBT+ community. A week or two later, this friend suggested that I get an Instagram account, so I did. Because the first person I followed was my genderfluid friend, this meant that Instagram suggested LGBT+ pages to me. This was when I first started properly learning about the trans community.

I started finding more trans people via Instagram and learning about what it feels like to be trans. YouTube became a source of education on trans topics around about late February 2016. I related to trans men quite a lot. After considering my gender for quite a few weeks, I finally came to the conclusion late at night that I was a trans man. Five minutes later, I had doubts!For the next few weeks, I was rather confused, uncomfortable and unhappy. I related a lot to trans men, but calling myself a man just didn't seem to fit, as much as I wanted it to. I even considered whether I was genderfluid, but I knew I wasn't because I didn't feel like my gender was fluid at all. Luckily, I stumbled across a few videos on YouTube about being non-binary. I can't remember who made the video but I remember them saying that you can transition and be non-binary. This struck a chord with me. I could identify as non-binary and yet still transition like I felt I wanted to. I discovered that some non-binary trans people could have the same feelings as binary trans people, yet still identify as non-binary.

This discovery was quite a relief for me. All the 'weird' feelings I'd had within the past few years started making sense. It was great to have a label. Eventually I realised my gender identity was agender (genderless or gender-neutral). I knew that it was okay for me to want to transition and not have to identify as a binary (or even non-binary) trans man.

Over the past two years, I have doubted my identity at times. Upon addressing these feelings, however, I always realise that these doubts were caused by me thinking too much about what other people may think about trans and non-binary people. One day, I might make a post in this series about self-doubt and how I overcome it.

This post is a brief overview of my gender identity in the past and discovering my identity. I plan to make more detailed posts on certain topics to do with my past and discovering my gender identity, such as dysphoria, self-doubt and how my gender expression has changed. Thank you for reading and goodbye until next time!
~Jay

Sunday, 17 September 2017

Apologies!

Once again I have forgotten for a lengthy period of time to post more blog updates! I don't really have much of an excuse, other than forgetfulness.

So, what have I been up to these past two months? Well...not much at all, really! I've been on lots of bike rides and have taken many photos. I can't remember much else of what I've been doing! However, I do remember that on the 6th of September I started my A-Levels! I'm going to a sixth form and it's at the same school I've been at for the past 5 years.

I've decided to take Biology and Chemistry as two of my A-Levels. Many people have told me that A-Level Chemistry is incredibly difficult, but I enjoy Chemistry and both of my teachers are great! I'm sure that I'm going to have a fun time learning Biology, too!

Now, about my third A-Level...it's a bit complicated! When I applied for sixth form, I chose Government & Politics as my third A-level. I also chose to do Core Mathematics, which is an AS-level course and so would only last for a year. However, upon looking at my time-table, I noticed that I didn't have many free periods in which to do extra study. This meant that I would have to do a lot of studying at home. I was considering dropping the subject after a week or two, but my first lesson was incredibly fun.

On Friday morning (15th of September) we were told during form time that we had until the end of that day to make any changes to our time-table. At this point, I had made up my mind that I wanted to drop Core Maths and I was now having doubts about Gov & Pol. So, during my 20-minute break, I went to the person in charge of changing and dropping subjects (I'll call them Mx. A so I don't have to mention their real name) and asked if I could drop Core Maths and swap Gov & Pol for Mathematics A-Level. My next lesson would have been Core Maths, so Mx. A found an A-Level Maths class which runs at the same time as my Core Maths class did. Even as I walked to the other end of the school, I was having doubts about my decision. At the end of that maths lesson I felt like I may have made a mistake by swapping. It was then that I remembered that some people had decided to pick 4 A-Levels and drop one after the first few weeks. These people have to decide by next Friday which ones they want to take. This gave me an idea; I went back to Mx. A and asked them if I could do Gov & Pol and A-Level Maths for one week.

I now have to make a decision...Mathematics or Government & Politics. I only have until Friday to decide! If anyone has done either of these subjects for A-Level, please contact me and tell me how you found the course!

Thank you for reading and goodbye until next time!
~Jay

Thursday, 20 July 2017

An Unexpected Stop During a Train Journey

I have quite an odd story from a train journey I made in October/November 2016 from Lincoln to Leicester. Everything was going alright until 20 minutes into the journey, there was a loud 'bump'. Nothing happened, though, and the train journey continued as normal the rest of the way. That is, until 5 minutes away from our destination, the train suddenly stopped! Nobody knew what was happening. People working on the train were making frequent, hurried trips from one end of the train to another. Several times throughout the next 15 minutes, one of the people working on the train would apologise for delays and update us on everything they discovered - which was pretty much nothing.

Then, after what felt like hours spent constantly confused, our train driver came out to tell us exactly what was going on. He told us that there was a blockage somewhere in the train. This confirmed one of my theories, and also strengthened my belief that the seemingly harmless 'bump' I heard had something to do with this. I was sure we had hit something back then. But what? The train driver then told us that we had hit some sheep. It was very sad to hear this, and I hope that their ends came quickly (they probably did, luckily.)

The most interesting thing I remember from this was that someone asked the driver, "Why didn't you call the police when you hit the sheep?" The train driver replied, "We only hit two sheep! You have to hit 5 sheep before you call the police!"

Well, I guess...the more you know...

I hope you enjoyed that story, and thank you for reading :)

Wednesday, 19 July 2017

Blackberry Season is Beginning!

Today, with the help of my best friend and her sister, I managed to collect a whole tub of blackberries! I'm looking forward to the next few weeks as I've seen masses of blackberries growing! By next week I should be able to go out to my main picking sites and come home with three or four tubs. A further week of blackberry picking should mean I can fill at least 5 tubs per day, on average. I might start taking an extra large tub with me so I can collect plenty of them.

I'm super glad that blackberry season has started because strawberry season has pretty much ended, and raspberry season seems to be coming to an end.

I'll be making jam with the blackberries, like I do every year, but I'm going to be using some to experiment with new recipes. I remember making a blackberry and orchard apple pie last year, which turned out great! This year I might try making some sort of cake (gluten free!) with blackberries.

If you have any good blackberry recipes, please leave them in the comments! Thank you for reading and goodbye until next time :)

Edible Plants in Lincoln

I'm making note of the plants I can eat in the place I live. There's not as much in Lincoln as you could find in some areas of Kent, but there's still some lovely plants to be found.

There's raspberries, strawberries and rhubarb in my back garden. Nettle seems to grow well too (haha). My front garden has ispaghula; the seed husks can be eaten. They have a nice texture and I have a recipe using them with some orange to make an excellent dessert. A relative of ispaghula, common plantain, also grows in my front garden. There's also dandelions. The flowers make very nice tea, the leaves are great when lightly boiled and the roots can be used as an alternative to coffee when well-roasted. I like to roast them until they're well-cooked yet still pale on the inside. Lightly roasted dandelion roots an ideal snack.

There are blackberries all over the place I live in, often accompanied by several elder trees. They're in the fields close to where I live, in many places along the River Witham and in liquorice park at the top of the hill in town (the place where I live is surrounded by hills formed by a glacier).

Liquorice park is a wonderful place to find things to eat. There's damsons and greengages, there's apples and pears. You can find raspberries there, too. Close by to the main entrance at the top (liquorice park is on the side of the hill) is a collection of herbs such as sage and thyme. While walking down the path once, my mum pointed out what she thought was horseradish. An information sign at the bottom entrance to the park confirmed this.

In the fields close to where I live, wheat fields occupy the shallow foot of the hills. I don't eat gluten (a story for my next blog post, maybe) so I can't eat any wheat plants that stray onto the surrounding grassy paths. However, I can eat the other cereal which can be found in several locations along the edge of the wheat fields - oats! There's also plantain at the top of the wheat fields. Where the shallow foot of the field abruptly becomes steeper, there is a good number of wild rose (aka dog rose). The flowers (not edible, I don't think) are lovely and the rosehips can be made into a wonderful syrup. The flavour of this syrup has similarities to apple, with a delightful tone of vanilla. Although if the syrup is at this stage you run the risk of it being undercooked, which definitely won't be great for your tongue! The seeds inside a rosehip have a fine, fur-like coating which is rather irritant to the skin and mouth.

From the fields I can find a path which leads to what remains of the old orchard. Along this path are some very large and flavoursome blackberries, so it's one of my favourite picking sites! Due to the fact that the orchard once covered this path, you can find a few long forgotten apple trees. I think there might be a pear tree or two, as well.

There's also a cobnut tree along the way. It reminds me a little of the small hazel forest that is/was (I have no idea if it's still there) in one corner of my primary school's playing field. I used to take hazelnuts home with me once the shells turned brown and store them in a sparkly jewellery box my sister gave me, along with an almond which to this day I still haven't managed to open! The almond tree was outside of my primary school, only thirty seconds away from the gates. Seeing as it is growing in England, it grows very slowly and only has a few almonds each year if it's lucky. It's hardly grown since I left primary school five years ago!

Talking about the almonds and hazelnuts has reminded me of the walnut tree and chestnut trees on the way back home from primary school. There were several chestnut trees, meaning that we always got plenty of them. We collected them in autumn and my mum roasted them in winter, around about Christmas time. I remember my mum roasting three or four trays of chestnuts on Christmas day, and they all had that sweet, nutty flavour and the soft, sometimes crumbly texture. It's strange that the only memory of that Christmas I have is eating chestnuts, and of my sister complaining when she got a bad chestnut! I'm quite sure that my mum made a chestnut stuffing. I guess that counts as another memory! I'm quite sure that was the same year we collected at least five baskets full of walnuts. We let them mature and started eating them in winter, too.

I was talking about the old orchard before I got side-tracked by those memories! Well then...in the small area left of the orchard, nearly every single apple tree and pear tree has a label on it (a few trees accidentally lost theirs!) informing you on the variety of the plant, when the variety was brought to Lincoln and where it originated from. As well as many, many old varieties of apple and pear, the orchard is home to a number of damson trees and even a quince tree! It's also quite a good area to spot wildlife. There are plenty of bunnies, for example, and in summer dragonflies and damselflies. My school sits over where part of the orchard used to be, and you can spot two large cooking apple trees at the front entrance; one is next to the entrance gate and the other is next to the exit gate.

My mum used to have a shop at the lawns (which is not far away from liquorice park. It's also behind Lincoln Castle.) In the lawns is a place called the John Dawber gardens. There are wild strawberries everywhere here. There's also a large blackcurrant bush next to one of the entrances. Embarrassingly, I didn't notice this until I went back to visit the place with my best friend last Tuesday. I think I have a vague memory of noticing it one day, now that I think about it, but even then I only noticed it one time before! There's a few apple trees close to the blackcurrants - don't worry, I noticed them! At the other end of the garden is an incredibly old variety of raspberry. This variety is so old that it's almost unrecognisable as a raspberry plant. The leaves are dark and glossy, and the fruits have quite a different taste to the raspberries you're probably used to.

In the lawns there was an awe-striking conservatory full of amazing plants brought back to Lincoln by Sir Joseph Banks. I loved that place very much and I spent hours upon hours there, especially while my mum's shop was open. It was a beautiful place, but the council decided to knock it down and extend the car park. The car park was hardly used before the extension and from what I've seen, that hasn't changed! Anyway, enough of focusing on the negative, and back to sharing the details of the wonderful plants this place contained! In one corner, I remember my mum pointing out to me the great, long leaves of banana plants. However, thanks to inadequate care there were only a few banana plants left by the time my mum opened up her shop. One of the plants I really admired was a tall fig tree with dark leaves, which was so old that it no longer grew figs each year. It had the remains of long-dead vines wrapped around its trunk. I have never been able to get any fruit or other edible plant parts from the conservatory, but I wanted to include it in this post anyway, because the conservatory was such an important place to me. There are some pots of lavender along the side of where the sanctuary cafe in the lawns used to be. They're still there! That reminds me...grow lots of lavender! Bees love lavender!

I'm pretty sure I've covered most of the major edible plants in Lincoln. Of course, there are one-off edible plants everywhere in Lincoln, such as a rosemary plant growing next to a lamp post close by to my house. It's also extremely likely that I've missed a lot of great places out, knowing what my memory is like. Well, I hope you enjoyed reading this post and I hope it wasn't too long for you! Thank you for reading :)

Sunday, 18 June 2017

GCSE exams!

I apologise for my absence! I have been very busy with my GCSE exams. Luckily, I only have three exams left. Most people finished their last exam on Friday. However, I chose to do triple science as a GCSE option. This means that I have to do 9 science exams, which is three more than those who don't take triple science. Each science exam is an hour long, but I have 25% extra time.

Why do I get extra time? Because I have a condition that makes my bones hurt sometimes, which can affect the speed at which I write. I also am allowed to use a word processor (basically a laptop) if I want to. I only used the word processor for English and RE exams, so I used the laptop 6 times out of the 20 exams I have done so far. I most likely won't need the word processor for the next three exams, either.

I have an exam tomorrow so I can only make this short post for now! I will make a longer post once this week is over.

In case you're wondering, I have a Biology exam tomorrow.